It has been many moons since there has been an update to this blog, but we here at Year of the Beard have not been idle! Far from it! We have been devoting countless hours developing a new Drinking Game for Rockies fans everywhere! No, it does not involve drinking every time Jason Giambi strikes out in the 9th inning with the tying run at second base, nor does it require one to drink every time Huston Street does something that makes you sick to your stomach. Either of those would require you wait until the ninth inning, and this will not do. We needed to come up with something that the devoted Rockies fan/alcoholic could play all game long, and so we present to you:
The Ian Stewart Drinking Game.
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| Ian Stewart, pictured here with his crotch. |
The set-up for this game is simple: pour yourself a drink, and turn on a Rockies game... chances are good that even for you light-drinking Rockies fans and coaches out there, this has been your habit since early May, anyway. Then, simply follow the instructions below:
- Take one drink every time Ian Stewart touches/grabs/rearranges his junk on camera. This can occur while playing defense, while running the bases, while at the plate, or when in the dugout.
- If Ian Stewart either a) swings and misses, or b) slides into base, and fails to touch his junk afterwards, drink two times.
- Combo: If Ian Stewart touches his junk with one hand, and then immediately switches hands and touches his junk with the other hand, chug.
It's that simple, folks. And with the beardful Stewart playing pretty darn well lately, he should be getting most of the starts for the remainder of the season, so you should be able to play pretty much every night! And even better, if you truly commit to this game, you should be passed out long before Giambi or Street trot into the game to ruin the rest of your evening. Enjoy!
